Who is family and why it matters

Quite a few people missed one or the other part of the narrative question about the definition of family.  It’s worth clarifying.

Birth vs. Blood

The U.S. Census Bureau defines a family as people who (a) reside together and (b) are connected by birth, adoption, or marriage.  These are all legal relationships which can be documented by searching public records.  Every birth certificate includes the name of the parents of record.

Karen Seccombe, the author of the textbook, uses the term blood in her definition.  Blood relations are not always legally documented – if your brother’s girlfriend becomes pregnant, but he doesn’t acknowledge paternity or marry her, the Census Bureau would not recognize that child as part of your family.  Seccombe’s definition would.  “Blood” refers to any linkage of family ties that people can trace – distant cousins, and the like.

Birth is a legally documented characteristic.  Blood is a socially constructed one.

Why it matters

Many people noticed that the Census Bureau excludes some groups that are generally accepted as families.  True – but it only matters if it has some outcome other than people having hurt feelings.

Families have legal, financial and social rights and benefits, and legal, financial, and social responsibilities.

Rights and benefits include inheritance laws and tax provisions, benefits under a variety of programs such as Social Security and Medicare, special treatment in a variety of circumstances, from military housing to disaster relief, the involvement of the courts when a relationship ends in divorce, and hundreds more.  Most of these are not available to cohabiting couples (regardless of their gender).

An article in the New York Times last week estimated that a gay/lesbian couple with children will, over the course of a lifetime, will have to spend between $41,196 and $467,562 more than a married couple with two children.  The analysis is not perfect – and they neglect the fact that much of the cost is not because the couple is gay but because they are not married – but the dollar amounts can be quite large.

Responsibilities include financial responsibility for the costs and debts of the home and children, the provision of care for children, non-violent behavior in the home (domestic violence is against the law), and many more.